Posted on by Seun Adesoye · 8 Comments

Relationship dollars

So this past week, I have been regaled with tales about relationships and people in them and I’m just wondering like ‘I shall never cease to be amazed’ cos I don’t understand you peoples generation. Yes, I’ve disowned myself, I’m now an old soul, born in the 80s 😌.

I think defining a relationship is pretty easy. It’s choosing to be in a loyal situation with someone because you like them and they’re adding something to your life. At least this is my definition of a relationship. Dictionary definition is too strict and I didn’t even use that ‘English’ dictionary, I used Merriam-Webster. Please you guys delete that ugly ‘English’ dictionary and get this one or Oxford, it messed us up in a test this year, I’m serious, I dun even want to think about it πŸ˜ͺ.

So back to topic, notice that my definition included ‘adding something to your life’, this isn’t limited to values or traits, it could be money, sex, good looks, gadgets, literally anything. There must be something, high-key there’s always something, we know but apparently not everyone knows. If we all knew the reason(s) why we’re entering relationships, I think the world will be a much safer place for hearts tbh.

I personally didn’t enter a relationship until this year cos I didn’t think I was ready like that all the previous years and I didn’t die. Why wasn’t I in a relationship? I don’t think it’s right to say yes to someone, make them see a future with you and then break up with them for some silly reason and this generation ehn, we’re fond of this rubbish. If you want to play with something, get a toy, don’t be using somebody’s anatomy to be catching cruise.

How will somebody get a girlfriend because it’s the trend? How will somebody say he’s using you to pass time after treating you like you’re his all? I’m not understanding really.

Let’s all know what we’re doing plis. People’s hearts are fragile, everyone be forming hard guy but people die emotionally. Don’t be acting pretentious with people’s children because you want to get something. I really respect guys who put their cards on the table, I for one encourage my male friends to put their cards on the tables before getting involved with any girl. It won’t kill you to say ‘I want friends with benefits’,(phrase it nicer sha πŸ˜…) and it won’t kill you if she says no. Move on, grow up. Which is hard, I know, too many immature people out here πŸ™„. I’ve actually found that there’s someone out there who will still say yes to your proposal so don’t die.

Lemme break it down in three easy steps if you didn’t get the gist. Before you start dating anyone,

1. Know why you actually want to date that person. The one asking, the one saying yes, y’all should know why you want to be attached and known to be attached to such human.

2. Make sure your partner knows why you’re in the relationship. This is you placing your cards on the table.

3. Enjoy said relationship. Treat it like a marriage. The way you won’t jump out and leave your marriage should be the way you wouldn’t jump out and leave your relationship. If you and your partner are like minded, I bet you’ll never leave that relationship no matter what happens. I know you people will say there’s still divorce but I’m tired and everybody is mad so I’ve given my piece.

Thank you for reading throughhhh ❀️. If you want more things like this, lemme know. If you don’t like it, we can like to go out so I can post about where you took me to 😊.

Byeee ❀️.

Posted on by Seun Adesoye · 10 Comments

Trad, glad.

So last week my blog reviews were legit the only fun thing that happened to me and I’m seriously not exaggerating. Tuesday is my day for classes and Wednesday and Thursday just came by like ugly art paintings, rubbish but you still have to look at them. Or in this case live through them. Then came Friday.

Friday, yesterday was my traditional day cos I’m in final year. For those who read my introduction, this isn’t news to you, for those who didn’t, ah kent even look at yew. Literally though, I can’t. Anyway sha, I thought it was going to be a day where we just sit down and eat food and all that sturv but I was gon be amazed.

You peopleessss, I went to a freaking partaaayyyy! Like the location which we didn’t have to go out for school for was decorated really good, there was a photo booth kinda section, there was a caterer, we had servers, we even had bouncers and a freaking guest list! The fact that the planning committee paid attention to all these details was delightful.

When we first got there, they gave us palm wine and pepper soup. First time I tasted palmwine, mehn it tasted fermented. Why didn’t anybody tell me that thing wasn’t sweet? People said they were both watered down, that’s why it tasted like that but who knows? After, they dropped water and juice on the tables and told us to please go select what we wanted. There was eba, egusi, αΊΉfọ, amala, gbegiri and ewedu, ikokore, ofada rice and stew and abacha. No no, low-key they tried but they packed my meat before I came back, I was so sad 😭😭😭. My meattt 😭.

Then we did like a tribal runway danceway sorta thing. It was quite nice. I went as a Rivers baby so I danced with them Edo, Delta children. ‘Rivers ke?’ You might wonder. I’m not famzing oh πŸ’, my grandma was Rivers, may she rest in peace. She’s the one who gave me Nkem sef. They kuku forced me to go and dance the dance and that’s when I came back and found that my meat had been taken 😭. αΊΈran mi 😭. Unilag took the light a lot though but my coursemates created their own music and danced like crazy. No no, it was actually fun and we paid just 3k. As we were leaving, I was just thinking ‘Who’s going to do wedding first? Let’s go and scatter the place mehn’.

Cross section of the traditional wears before I run off 😊.

There are actually more but I can’t post them all. It was really beautiful though. Our culture is beautiful. Plenty headache cos traditional ornaments are heavy but still beautiful.

See you guys on my next blog post. Byeee 😊❀️.

Posted on by Seun Adesoye · 16 Comments

Sand, sun and fun!

Hiiii once again 😊. Lool, I always seem excited, I know.

So my first blog post is going to be a sort of review in a way ish. I’m writing this cos I went to the beach recently and I’m still feeling the beachy vibeeeeesss.

Saturday was my lover’s birthday so on Sunday, we went to the beach. It was Elegushi. It was supposed to be Oniru but Uber guy told us they’re filling up Oniru. We called Oniru’s beach number that they put on the Internet, they didn’t pick, I don’t even understand why, so we decided to just close our eyes and go to Elegushi. I know most people have been there but for those who haven’t, Elegushi is at Lekki Phase 1, Lekki. Since it was Sunday and we got there by like 1, it was quite empty so it was actually looking like a private beach.

When it got to like 3, ọmọ see people, I really don’t know what’s private about Elegushi though πŸ’. We were looking for a place to seat, those beach constructions, I don’t know their specific name plis πŸ˜… and we finally settled for one that offered a good deal. He said we didn’t need to pay to sit but we had to buy something and so we did.

I’m begging you in the name of God, please if you see this place, don’t buy their jollof rice.

Their jollof rice was so undone the thing was making noise as we were chewing it. Even the chicken that was looking so massive, lol, it was bone and skin, lool, massive scam. So since the jollof rice was unfortunate, we decided to buy chicken and chips.

That thing you see above is 3 thousand naira, you can see the unfortunate rice in one corner. And they couldn’t even give us Irish potatoes, sweet potatoes right there, the salad had no cream and the chicken was so hard I was struggling with it 😭. So basically, it was a bad deal. They now wanted to scam is in the end untop of it all, lool, we were just dedd. The place was fine small sha, I was rhyming with their colours, they should have made me ambassador.

We brought drinks so we started playing random games. We played ‘Never have I ever’, one vulgar game that I shouldn’t mention 😌 and Lemon. Mehn, Lemon is the best drinking game ever, I’m serious. I played it at a party and hated it cos I was losing so hard 😭 but I wasn’t losing yesterday so I liked it 😊. Lemme teach y’all how to play it, you’re welcome 😌.

Basically in Lemon, everyone gets a number and then when the game starts, you have to say your number ‘lemon’ and somebody else’s number. Like let’s say I’m number 1 and I’m playing a game with 5 other people, I have to go, ‘1 lemon 5’ or any other number. If the number I pass it on to doesn’t pass it on as well, they drink. If they pause, they drink. If they stutter, they drink. If they call a number that’s not in the game, they drink. Any mistake sha, you drink. Doesn’t it just sound annoyingly fun 😊?

Well it was fun and one side effect to drinking too much is the constant urge to pee. Did you know that it’s 100 naira to pee at Elegushi? Yes oh, it takes two bottled water(on the mainland plis) to ease your bladder. When it was 5, my friends actually paid 150. I’m guessing the later it gets, the more expensive peeing seems to be though I’m not really understanding πŸ€”. At least the toilets were clean so that’s a plus.

We left by past 6 and came back to school to sleep and if we’d known 3rd mainland bridge was open, that’s where we’d have passed but we didn’t know so we took long route. Painful sturvs.

All in all sha, Elegushi isn’t so bad. Rowdy, dirty, expensive suya(1 stick, 1k, when the meat is not filled with gold) but at least clean toilet, affordable gate fee(same thing for practically every beach really). I give it a 5. A meh. E just dey.

So I’m done with my review but not a review-like blog post. If you liked it, do like or comment or both. Thank you 😊. Lemme drop one picture of me though it’s dark πŸ˜ͺ. Byeee 😊😊.

Posted on by Seun Adesoye · 6 Comments

La Introduction!

Hiiii everyone who took time out to open this baby girl’s blog post. Super grateful ❀️.

So after years of deliberating and pushing and ‘Seun, open a blog now’, I finally finally opened it 😊. I’m not one to write like really deep heart somersaulting stuff but I’d try my best to keep whatever I post as interesting as possible. Let’s get to my actually introducing myself, yeah?

My name is Seun Nkem Adesoye. I’ve had so many nicknames in my life I technically don’t have one. The ‘Nkem’ placed in between my fully Yoruba names is cos I’m mixed, father’s Yoruba, mother’s Delta. I’m half breed yo πŸ€™. I live in Surulere and my age, I’m a ’90s baby, that’s enough info 😌. I’m a next month graduate of the University of Lagos, University of first choice and the nation’s pride, this their slogan cracks me up honestly πŸ˜‚.

I don’t specifically have a best food really but there was a time I could have legit died for beans, those were the days mehn πŸ˜ͺ, now I’m just really aimless with food. I like talking as long as I’m making sense(not drunk talk, nobody likes drunk talk except secrets are being spilled then that’s alright 😊). I like writing, I like movies, I used to like reading but I don’t know what happened to me, somebody please teach me how to develop a reading culture again, my vocabulary is dying 😭. Oh and I also like ice cream πŸ˜‹, not just ice cream really, I like yogurts and milk drinks. Honestly I don’t know why, I just do.

I don’t exactly have a favourite colour either but I wear a lot of black and I fancy the colour blue. I have an okay number of close friends, a lover and a female husband(watch ‘This is it’ and you shall understand). I have a boyfriend as well who I’m missing excessively but big girls don’t cry, y’know.

The first three things you’d most likely think when you meet me are:

1. Oh wow. She’s so small. How is she so small? She doesn’t look that small in her pictures. Catfish catfish.

Right after this comes,

2. Aww, she’s so adorable. She’s cute and she looks like a baby. I just want to stuff her in my bag and carry her home or at least carry her, I have to carry her.

3. I don’t think this one is alright oh. She is definitely not normal. Where did they find this one? She’s either drunk or high cos I don’t know how human being can be behaving like this.

You might think I’m writing these things to flatter myself but I’m not. I’ve heard these 3 things so many times it’s almost like a song. The third one though, it depends on which mood you meet me, it could be the first thing you notice.

I personally feel I’ve written more than enough about myself, I dunno about you. I don’t want you to get bored on me. And if you’re really observant, you’d notice I tried to follow that primary school ‘Myself’ format. It’s really the best when you’re trying to talk about yourself. If there’s anything extra, you want to know, lemme knowww in the comments.

My first post post is right after this one so don’t leave this blog without reading it. Do comment and like if I at least made you smile a little, thank you 😊.